The magic number.... - Colorado Fishing Forum

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Old 04-08-2014, 05:58 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default The magic number....

As I reflect on my 3000 posts, I can only feel a sense of awe at myself. To be the most prolific poster in the 9 months I've been here leads me to love myself in a way I never thought possible. Many greats have hit this mark before me...

Cap Anson, the first guy to do it... A brilliant hitter in an era when pitching often dominated. A man who set the bar and invented the 3000 club. I tend to think his accomplishment was nowhere near the greatness I have achieved as a poster, and as a man. In short, Cap Anson ain't shit.






Derek Jeter, the most recent guy to accomplish this feat. The man is basically a hack compared to me.





Many so-called "men" have done this, most notably the great Pete Rose... Possibly the greatest of all time (before I got here)... And the man isn't in the Hall of Fame. Hell, he's not even allowed to have anything to do with baseball!!! 4,256 hits.... It's probably for the best though... as he pales in comparison to my glory.

Let's look at breakdowns here... Of Jeter's 3,321 hits, only 256 were homeruns. This is basically kindergarten shit, guys... My HR/AB ratio is about a .950. In other words, I kill shit on the reg.


So, in closing, I would like to accept the award for "The dude with the most pathetic social life in history" with a quote from my favorite (albeit subpar by comparison) member of the 3,000 club:




"My motto was always to keep swinging. Whether I was in a slump or feeling badly or having trouble off the field, the only thing to do was keep swinging."

Hank Aaron


Bow down, bitches... you're in the presence of greatness.
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Old 04-08-2014, 06:02 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Congratulations Mr. Opry!!

I am in awe of your awesome posting skills.
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Old 04-08-2014, 06:18 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I have over 3600 posts, and haven't been banned.

New record for me.
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Old 04-08-2014, 07:36 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I was worried 2000 in 5 years was problem that might need mental help but I blame my mental abnormalities to mercury poisoning from eating too much fish. Congratulations
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Old 04-08-2014, 07:45 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Some people fish with all their free time........

Last edited by golden rod; 04-08-2014 at 09:05 PM.
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Old 04-08-2014, 08:12 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Awesome Opry! If possible I'd like to get your autograph.

Last edited by Fordo; 04-08-2014 at 08:31 PM.
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Old 04-08-2014, 08:21 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Opry I feel like we need to have a beer talk baseball.
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Old 04-08-2014, 08:22 PM   #8 (permalink)
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No autographs... I'm going to go all bitch-made punk Barry Bonds on y'all. Just douche it right up...

If I spent as much time on the water as I did watching my kids and fucking off on here, I'd have the state record for every species in the state right now.

First I'd like to thank the Avalanche thread and all the back and forth with muninoel on Sundays when I attempted to explain to him the error of his preferred football team... Without these things I would have never reached this god-like status.

Next I'd like to thank the elusive catfish... The bastard that set off my long Urban Fishing Report thread.

And finally I would like to thank my dad... Without him, there would have been no love for fishing, no appreciation of the English language, and no fertilization....

Rockies rule, Nuggets suck, FXR, muskie fillets, laker mounts, small pond blastingz and a partridge in a pear tree.

#micdrop
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Old 04-08-2014, 08:47 PM   #9 (permalink)
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The "Jaws" indecent alone is makes your autograph worth something.
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Old 04-08-2014, 08:57 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Dude... I would give anything to have gotten that on live video.... Just because nobody believes me that it happened. I had 2 witnesses, so I am justified.. But to have that sh** on video.....
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